Otto is 2 Months Old! (Plus his 1 month update)

Dear Sweet Boy,
I cannot believe that you are two months old. I am really hoping to do one post per month but I'm already a month behind so this will likely be a combo post.  Sorry about that! But you are one loved little boy so don't you worry about a thing.  I'm also going to claim that you are a little higher maintenance than Stella was so if you want posts to read in the future you got to nap during nap time, okay?

Stats
You are my chunky monkey. You gained your birth weight back faster than your sisters and didn't stop there.  I think it is a combo of a few things more on that below. 

2 Weeks Old

So serious.

Happy 2 Months!

At birth, you weighed 3.664 kg (8 lbs 1 oz) which is in the 73rd percentile.  Remember how many growth scans I got during your pregnancy because I was measuring small? Two growth scans and one was 4 days before you were born which estimated you weight 3.7 kg which was pretty spot on!  You were back to birth weight at 6 days old. You were 51.5 cm (20.25 in) long which was in the 80th percentile and your head was 35 cm (13.7 in) which was in the 66th percentile.

At one month you weighed 4.79 kg (10 lbs 9 oz) which was in the 74th percentile and you were 56.4 cm (22.2 inches) long which was in the 85th percentile. 

At two months old you weighed 5.52 kg (12 lbs 2 oz) which was in the 50th percentile and you were probably around 59 cm (23.25 in) long.

Eating

As mentioned earlier you are a little chunk. My milk supply this time around was really good just like it was with Stella and you seem to handle my fast letdowns with no problem. Stella used to gag.  You also very rarely spit up which makes me less worried about overfeeding you.  Both of your sisters were spitters (Linnea more than Stella) so I was worried they were getting too full and would spit up so I wouldn't let them nurse quite as long.

You've also been a little fussier than Stella so I fed you more often than I did with her. I also didn't try to keep you on much of an eating schedule until you were closer to a 3 weeks to a month old like I did your sisters so I'm sure that helped. During the first month, you ate every 1-3 hours.  Once you were about 3 weeks old I tried going every 2-3 hours but no more than 3.  Then around 5-6 weeks, I started letting you go every 4 hours if you were sleeping during the day to help you get closer to being ready to sleep train.  Then we went to Denmark and our schedule kind of went out the window but we're working on getting you back on track.

We had a few latching issues at the very beginning.  I always forget how newborns have to be taught how to eat, latch, etc.  I used Silverette nursing cups and they have been lifesavers! I wish I had then when I was nursing your sisters.

First feeding outside of the apartment. Like literally right outside but it still counts!

You eat on both sides for every feed until it is night time.  Our schedule around 6-8 weeks has been eat around 730, 1115 and then either 1445 before we pick up your sisters or 1530 after we get back from getting your sisters and then it should be 19 but you like to snack around 1730/18 if I let you (aka you scream your head off until I give in).  Then we do a dream feed around 22/23 meaning I unswaddle you and change your diaper without waking you up too much and try to feed you on one side before laying you back down reswaddled.  For the most part, you do a great job with this.  Your sister Linnea never did a dream feed because I couldn't wake her up for it.  

You burp like a man champ. Most of the time you burp pretty quickly and it is also usually loud.

I quickly figured out I needed one-handed breakfast options or else it could be two hours before I'd get breakfast after being awake.

I put a paper towel over you once I started noticing you were getting food dropped on you while you were eating. Sorry, buddy! 

Milk Coma

Sleeping

Your first two nights at home were rough.  You would only sleep on me while nursing, on my chest or in my arms. We do not co-sleep and this made me really nervous and exhausted.  I realized we held you so much during naptimes during the day that you didn't really know how to sleep in your bed alone.  So we worked on that during naps and you did much better on night number three at home. I am a BIG believer in teaching babies how to sleep.  It doesn't just magically happen. In my opinion, you can reinforce good or bad sleeping habits.  For us, we wanted you to be able to put yourself to sleep meaning we laid you down drowsy but awake and you'd put yourself to sleep using a paci or no paci.  I didn't want to nurse or rock you to sleep because then I'd have to do that every time you woke up at night and I'm just not going to do that.  It took a lot of patience and practice but you are doing a great job putting yourself to sleep now!

In the early newborn days, you'd wake up twice usually around 2 and then again around 5 before getting up around 8/9. Some nights were more than that but for the most part, it was twice if I went to bed around 23 which isn't ideal but waking up 3 times per night didn't sit well with me.  Now (starting around 5 weeks or so) you usually wake up once around 3/4 and then again around 7/8.  So I usually get about 4 hours and then another 2-3 hours which isn't bad.

I forget how loud newborns are when they sleep. So much grunting. Like little goats.  One difference this time around was we bought an Owlet Baby Monitor which tracks your heart rate and oxygen levels.  Is it necessary? No. Is it expensive? Yes, although I bought ours used. It is worth it to me? 110%! I used to watch Linnea and Stella breathe instead of sleeping and then when I'd wake up after falling asleep I'd panic and look again to make sure they were still breathing.  This was something that I didn't think would bother me pre-kids in fact I laughed at breathing monitors then but post-kids I wish I would have had an Owlet with Linnea and Stella. I sleep so much better knowing I don't have to watch your breathing.

I love swaddled babies!

There is a circle that lights up green when everything is within normal limits.  It will play a lullaby and show a yellow light if it seems that your sock fell off or is loose.  That has happened twice right when we started using it until we learned how to put it on and then maybe one other time.  It also has shown us a blue light a few times meaning it disconnected from the base.  We've never heard the red alarm which is when the heart rate is too high or low or the oxygen level is too low.

Another reason I wanted it was because Stella had RSV as a baby and I wanted to know your oxygen level if you got sick which was good because Linnea and Stella both got sick around 5 days after you were born and then you had a bit of a cold but nothing compared to Stella at 2 weeks old thankfully.

I tried to soak up the newborn naps on me as much as I could handle since I knew this time would be short.  Even now as I type this these pictures seem like they were years ago. Babies don't keep.

Naptimes often looked like you, on my lap, with a laptop as well so I could get stuff done and hold you.

Clothes

You wore size 50 and 56 your first two months.  There were a few size 62 pajamas that you could also fit in.  We had several gender-neutral outfits that you wore that your sisters also wore but I also bought several packets of clothing from Facebook Marketplace.  It was really fun trying to figure out what style of boys clothes I liked.  It is weird that the only difference between you and your sisters at this point is a body part and yet you need a whole new wardrobe.  You wore size 1 and 2 diapers your first two months of life. We like the Libero brand.

This was a magic sleeper. Both Linnea and Stella had their first long stretches of sleep in it (6 hrs) and you did well in it your first night too!

Playtime

I tried to be better about tummy time this time around since we weren't very good with Stella.  It seems we are doing okay but there is always room for improvement.  You tolerate it pretty well which is nice especially if you can watch your sisters.

Little bobblehead

We have also been doing a lot of side-lying since that is supposed to help your head and neck.

You like to look at high contrast books and toys.

Our Days

The first few weeks of newborn life were slow and busy.  It was hard at times being stuck under you in the chair and yet other times it was a wonderful excuse to slow down.  We kept your sisters home the first 2 weeks to help keep germs away which only kind of worked since they both got sick when you were 5 days old.  But they were healthy enough to go back at 2 weeks!

Very rarely the first month was one parent with all 3 kids and if there was it was me.  Your dad couldn't do much if you were hungry all of a sudden so you mostly stuck close by me.

I do feel like the days were/are weirder this time around because of COVID.  By now with Linnea, since she was a summer baby also, we would have introduced you to all of our friends.  But due to COVID, you were 3 or 4 weeks old before you met any of our friends and when you did you only met Angela and later Jared.

You seem to be a bit fussier than Stella was or at least harder to calm down or hungrier.  Maybe a combination.  I don't really remember how fussy or chill Linnea was because she was my only focus so it didn't seem to be a big deal if she was fussy.  It could also be that since you have two older sisters you feel like you need to make yourself known when you need something . . .

Jake took these next few pictures on our way home from Denmark but I love how every day they are. Just me trying to calm you down or change your diaper.

Activities and Outings

Not much to say here because of COVID.  Thankfully we had several nice days in August and September so we could be outside.

Our first family walk. 

If I'm being honest, our first family walk was kind of a disaster. It was my first time out of the apartment after you were born (you were 3 days old) and I didn't realize how much I needed to move my body.  We also didn't realize how many moving parts we now had with a baby and two kids.  Your dad and I were trying to talk and also not let your sisters get hurt in the street or fall into the lake.  It was chaotic and I ended up breaking off to walk with just you.  On the way home Linnea was being silly and the red stroller rolled in between two parked cars.  She ran after it and gave us a heart attack. Postpartum emotions made that super fun.  Don't worry, we practiced and got better at family walks over the next two months.

This was another walk with just the two of us.

Your dad started playing frisbee again a few weeks after you were born.  Basically, as soon as I thought I could handle putting all 3 of you to bed.  Those nights made me feel like superwoman!  It helped when you weren't screaming your head off.

In March, I started getting more active on a Facebook group for women having babies in 2020 in Sweden.  I have lots of mom friends but not many on parental leave so I wanted to find at least one person to do parental leave with to help it not be so lonely.  

I hosted several virtual fikas over Zoom and after a few of those I felt like a few of us clicked well so we made a Facebook chat and started up a virtual friendship.  Three out of the four of us met up in person for an outside picnic.  The fourth person lives near me so we were able to meet up a few times (like when she messaged me to come out to my balcony so she could sing happy birthday to me).  It has been so fun and encouraging going through pregnancy, labor/delivery, and postpartum right along with several others.  We've been cheering each other on through each step.

I met another mom at a restaurant near me. We chatted for only a few minutes but exchanged info and went on a walk a week later.  Now we have our own stroller gang with 5 mamas and counting.  We are often chatting in the middle of the night while nursing about all things baby, sleep, schedules, products we might need, etc.  It is not lost on me that making friends as an adult is hard and that I've been extremely lucky and fortunate to do that again with a new set of friends. I look forward to many stroller dates this next year!

Our first of many stroller gang walks!

Firsts and New Skills

I forget how much babies need to learn like how to eat, sleep, etc. You have to be taught how to nurse correctly and how to fall asleep on your own.  We mostly focused on those two skills these last two months.

First bath! This time I knew to give it to you in the bathroom after steaming it up a bit so you weren't cold!  

You took your first bottle this month to prepare for me leaving you for the first time.  After every baby, I've gotten a massage as my first outing and the bottle practice is always for that.  You did a great job while I was away and I enjoyed a 90-minute massage because I knew a 60-minute one would just feel too short.  It was a gift to myself that I do not regret.

One of the biggest things when you were 1 month old, 7 weeks old actually, is you met your grandparents.  Grandma Debbie and Papa Larry and your Aunt Lindsay, Uncle Aaron and cousins Avery, Jocelyn and Connor.  It was love at first sight with Papa Larry.

To get to Denmark we took a 20-minute bus ride to Central Station in Stockholm. Then took a train from Stockholm to Gothenburg which took about 3 hours.  Then we had about 2.5 hours in Gothenburg before our ferry left.  The ferry ride was 3 hours and 15 minutes.  Then we had a 20-minute car ride to the house where we were staying.  Overall it took us about 11 hours from door to door which isn't short however the whole travel day was pretty good considering it was our first trip with 3 kids and Otto was a fuss bucket.  It was nice that on the train and the ferry we could move around versus being trapped in car seats or on an airplane.  And once we arrived we had zero jetlag and enough bedrooms that we could sleep all night without issues.

 

Otto was smitten with Papa Larry. I had texted my parents to say that Otto had been fussy that day but he was all smiles for my dad.

Otto was so fascinated with Papa Larry.

My brother Aaron and Otto

Linnea and Stella loved being carried around by Avery.  Connor had his appendix removed 3 days before we got together.  He was maybe a little slower moving the first day but after that you would have never known.

This was the backyard of the house.  The house was gorgeous and perfect for our families.  It basically had 3 wings so all 3 families could have their own space.  Two of the wings included kitchens and living rooms.  There were 7 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms plus a long table that could seat all of us!

Avery read to the girls several times which was nice and the girls loved it.

Avery also put both Linnea and Stella to bed which they loved.

Linnea fed the dogs which she loved.

My brother did most of the cooking which no one complained about.  It was all really great.  He even made cinnamon rolls from scratch one morning.

Jake hung up a rope swing and all of the kids loved it. I had to go inside. Watching the kids swing gave me major anxiety!  And thanks to this swing Stella is constantly saying 'higher, higher, faster' when she is on a normal swing.

The kids loved this swing but man it made me nervous!

Sister & Brother Moments

Your sisters love you and just want to hold you and touch you and talk to you.

Reading to you

Who needs personal space?

Linnea Update/New Skills

Your sister Linnea is funny.  She has a unique accent when she speaks English and often times she uses the grammar word order for Swedish when speaking in English.  She is easy going and very helpful.  Recently when we ask her to do something she'll say 'Oh sure!' or 'Certainly'.  This does not happen all the time but when it does your dad and I both laugh.

Linnea Funnies/Quotes

Linnea told us she wanted to take us on a family field trip. She wanted to take us to a park that she's been to with her class.  So we picked Linnea and Stella up early one day and off we went.  Linnea was leading the way.  She told us it was the acorn park and we knew of one acorn park and asked if it was that but she said no.  So we followed her not having a clue where we were headed.

On the way there at several different times, Jake and I looked at each other and thought she has to be lost or confused.  We also said that at the end of this we will know whose directional sense she has.  If we don't get there she has Jake's sense of direction and if we do she has mine.  Ha!

Well wouldn't you know . . .

She found it!

This was the drawing of the park Linnea did before we went.  I saw it when we got back and was so impressed with how good it was especially the acorns.

After watching Kiki's Delivery Service Linnea is really into witches and she really wants to fly for real life.  She gets mad at gravity for holding her down. This comment surprised us but I think we talked about gravity when we read a book about going to the moon.  She wanted a broomstick so she could fly.

Stella Update/New Skills

Stella is a big ball of feelings at 2.5 years old. Her baby cheeks are still going strong.  She needs things to be done the right way.  She has a great memory and knows where things belong.  She loves pretending to be a kitty cat and will often start meowing.

This girl and her personality. I'm so thankful I get to watch her shenanigans.

She started potty training a few weeks before you were born and has done a great job with it.  Her transition back to preschool was kind of rough.  It turns out that being out of school for 9 weeks, learning how to use the potty, gaining a new brother, and moving classrooms is a bit much all in a short amount of time.  But after a few days of talking with her teachers about how to help with the transition, she seems to be doing well.

Stella loves holding Linnea's hand especially on the way home from preschool.  Stella and Linnea love playing together at the preschool park before their groups split up.

Stella is getting pretty good on her balance bike.

Stella Funnies/Quotes
I was pushing Stella in a swing and she said "Tell me when you get exhausted." I laughed and said okay.  Then a little bit later he said "Tell me because you will definitely be exhausted." I thought she heard this word in a book but Jake told me that he has said it while pushing the kids on the tree swing.

Remember

I want to remember the feeling of a fresh new baby on my chest.  The newborn baby cries and how you settle just by being close to me.  

The newborn stage was something I was definitely looking forward to and didn't want to wish away but man do I also love a routine and more sleep. I want to remember the moment I found out you were a boy (which I had suspected but had been wrong two other times so I wasn't sure). You are my little buddy and I am so excited to get to know you as you start showing us more of your personality.

Love,

Your Mama

Otto's Birth Story

It has been a LONG time since I wrote a blog post so I hope I remember how to do it. And I hope I can do it each month like I did for the girls. #thirdkidproblems (Seeing as Otto is 2 months old and I haven't posted a one month blog it isn't looking good buddy but I'll try to play catch up!)

We became a family of five on August 25th, 2020 in the middle of a pandemic.  And here I thought the 3rd pregnancy should be 'easy' since I'd done it twice before.  Ha!

I really thought I'd go into labor before Echo's due date.  I was 4 days late with Linnea and one day early with Stella so I figured I'd be a few days early with Echo (Otto's nickname when I was pregnant).  

Prenatal Update

6 Days before his arrival

Overall, my pregnancy with Echo was really good.  Possibly the best out of all 3.  It was easier when I was pregnant with Linnea (Baker) because if I was sick or tired Jake could just chill by himself.  If I was sick or tired during this pregnancy he had two kiddos to look after so that was definitely harder on him.  The last trimester of this pregnancy was probably my best.  I didn't feel like I had to slow down until week 37.  That is when I felt like things were relaxing more in my hips and pelvis when I walked and my walking speed really slowed down at that point.

Before getting pregnant this third time around Jake and I made an agreement that I would prioritize working out/staying in shape for this pregnancy.  It feels silly saying that.  It isn't like my goal was to get super ripped.  The main goal was to make sure I continued to do ab and back exercises so I could walk, pick up the girls, etc and not be in the amount of pain I was in while pregnant with Stella.  It definitely worked.  My workouts were short (20-30 minutes) usually 2-3 times per week and not strenuous at all. The main focus was on engaging my TVA (transverse abdominal muscles).  I followed several accounts on Instagram (Good for the Swole, Deliciously Fit and Healthy, The Belle Method) and bought a prenatal workout program and a subscription follow-along program to help keep me on the right track. At 34/35 weeks I started focusing on relaxing my pelvic floor which I think was key during delivery. More on that later!

Echo moving around!

Another thing we focused on during this pregnancy was my postpartum mental health.  With Linnea and Stella, I think I had some postpartum rage which is something I hadn't ever heard of until after I was mostly over it with Stella. I've never had a hard time attaching to our kids and I didn't ever cry a lot so I assumed I was fine.  However, when I'm nursing (10-14 months after birth) I can get easily irritated, have very little patience, and get easily annoyed with little things, and most of the time it is directed towards Jake (for some it is towards their kids).  We used to just joke that he was more annoying while I was nursing and then was less annoying when I stopped.  Then one day I saw something about postpartum rage on Instagram and thought, yep! I totally had that!  So knowing this I talked to my midwife about what I could do this time around to be more proactive. She suggested I contact my primary care physician (vårdcentral) to make an appointment for therapy or seek out family counseling.

I had my first therapy appointment when Otto was 9 weeks old and it was really great.  This postpartm period already seemed better before the appointment but I went anyway and I'm glad I did. She recommended some breathing exercises, for me to keep a worry journal and for me to exercise hard enough that I was breathless.  I hadn't been breathless for a workout in a LONG time.  So I went running that afternoon and it was really, really good.

It helped a ton to just know what I had before was a real postpartum issue and for Jake and I to talk about it openly.  Sleep is a major factor for me as well.  I like to sleep and need more sleep than Jake so when he would give up his sleep by staying up late or getting up early I'd get really frustrated.  All I wanted was a full night's sleep and he was giving that up which caused lots of resentment.  So this time around he isn't staying up super late (later than me) or getting up super early until I can sleep through the night.  Some women ask their partners to give up alcohol during pregnancy, I just need him to not give up sleep.

I loved my cookie shelf!

I really wanted to capture my pregnant belly this last time around. Our bodies are amazing.

This belly hugging move might look really weird but it made a huge difference in my overall health this pregnancy.  Engaging my deep core muscles helped my back and abs stay strong so I wasn't in pain which was fantastic!

I'm using the ball to remind myself to keep my pelvic floor relaxed which I started doing around 34/35 weeks pregnant.

Echo dropped!

The plan for labor and delivery was that our friends Angela and Jared would take the girls.  We were also quarantining and not sending the girls to preschool to keep germs away and to keep Jake healthy so he could be at delivery.  If he had a cough or any COVID symptoms he couldn't be there.  Plan B was for Angela to be at the delivery with me.  I should say, several friends offered to watch the girls which was so great.  It is hard being away from family but when friends turn into family it is so very reassuring!

One of our last family of 4 pictures (well I guess 5 if you include Riley).

This is actually the last picture in between contractions.

The days leading up to Echo's delivery I would feel contractions, mostly braxton hicks with no real pain, especially at night but it would always calm down and nothing would happen.  I also felt lots of downward pressure.  One night, about a week before he was born I woke up at 2 with what felt like contractions and mild/moderate pain.  Went to the bathroom and the pain continued. I woke Jake up, sat on the exercise ball, started timing contractions.   I was so surprised at how fast and sudden they were. They were coming every 3 minutes or so and were painful. We called the hospital and our friends.  The hospital said we could come in to get checked. We decided to wait until our friends arrived to see how things were going.  Then everything calmed down and that was that.  Our friend Jared stayed the night and nothing happened.  He also stayed in our guest apartment the next night just in case.  Still no baby.

I was having contractions and Stella was worried about me so we cuddled.

I had a midwife appointment two days before my due date and I was hoping for some progress but nothing.  I wasn't dilated and she couldn't do a membrane sweep because it wasn't possible to get to the membrane.  My belly was still measuring small (measuring 32 cm (equal to 32 weeks) at 40 weeks which was the same measurement I was at 2.5 weeks earlier).  She brought in another midwife to check me and then referred me for a weight check ultrasound.  The heart rate was also 125ish when it had been higher 140/150 for the rest of the pregnancy.  That made me nervous and I felt defeated in general.  

I called the midwife back to ask more questions about the heart rate and the ultrasound check to see if I could get in before the weekend (it was Thursday). She reassured me that the heart rate dropping towards the end of pregnancy was fine.  She also suggested that I call the ultrasound clinic to get a time instead of waiting for a letter with a time and date for the appointment.  So I called the ultrasound clinic and through tears, I tried to explain that I wanted an appointment and she tried to calm me down by saying that they just got the referral minutes before 🙈.  I got an appointment for the next day (Friday, Aug 21st, 1 day before my due date) at 10.

The weight check appointment went well.  Echo was measuring about 3700 g (8 lbs 2 oz) and everything looked great.  The weekend came and went.  

Labor & Delivery

On Monday, Aug 24th around 4 am I started having some contractions.  They were every 10ish minutes and I could mostly sleep through them. I timed them for a little and then tried to get some sleep.  Around 9/10 that morning they were still hanging around which is usually when they'd died down the last few days.  We hesitantly messaged our friends to give them a heads up and to let Echo either calm down which had happened in the past or keep going with the contractions.

I tried hanging/pulling on a rope from the exercise bar that Jake has. I had read that if you are pulling/hanging on something it is hard to also keep your pelvic floor tight so it helps you to stay relaxed if you are pulling on something.  After that and some more ball bouncing, I got in the bathtub for a little while.

Around 1530 I called the hospital, Karolinska Solna, as contractions were getting closer together. They said I could come in to get checked. I had actually called them 3 times total over the last day to decide when it was time to go in.  It is funny that even the third time through labor I was still afraid I'd miss it and be farther along than I realized before going in and therefore not be able to get an epidural.  Trust me, you can't miss actual labor.  

In Sweden, you register at the hospital you'd like to give birth at and then when you are in labor you call them to make sure they have room for you.  If they don't they'll send you to another hospital in town.  I delivered at my registered hospital for Linnea (Danderyd) and Otto (Karolinska) but not Stella.  I had registered at Danderyd but they were full so we were sent to Karolinska and loved our midwives there.  I went on my own in a taxi while Jake waited for our friend to come to get the girls. He wouldn't be able to go in with me right away anyway so I figured this would cut down on his waiting time at the hospital.

I got to the hospital and was in a room within minutes.  They hooked me up to a monitor and did an exam. I was only 3 cm dilated and my cervix was still 2 cm long.  I was monitored for 30 minutes and then told to go on a walk outside the hospital for an hour or two until things picked up since my contractions were only coming every 10 minutes according to the monitor which means they slowed down a little bit.  Because of COVID I am not allowed to walk the halls so the best they can do is send you out of the hospital. At 1730, Jake met me outside with our bag and the baby car seat and we walked and then decided to grab dinner.

Pausing for a contraction.

Do not let this very posed picture fool you. 

Laboring in a restaurant is not something I'd recommend. It is mildly/very awkward. I barely ate anything and mostly swayed while standing at our hightop table.  We headed back to the hospital at 19 and at this point I had tears in my eyes during several of the contractions on the short walk back to the hospital. It was obvious to the midwife I was having more painful contractions. She checked me again and I was still 3 cm maybe 4 but my cervix was short, only half a centimeter left, so they admitted me which meant Jake was allowed to come up.

They did a COVID test, swab up my nose, which really wasn't bad and they put in an IV which was awful. I have bad veins. The one in my hand didn't work after lots of prodding and the one in my arm was really painful. I cried out in a different kind of pain from the IV and the midwife acknowledged that it was her hurting me and not the contractions.  They hooked me up to a monitor and I tried breathing through contractions. I was WAY better at that this time around. It helped that I didn't have back labor like I did with Linnea.

Another noteworthy thing, no one was wearing masks. I wasn't required to wear one and none of the midwives did either. I asked what would happen if my test came back positive and they said probably nothing because the midwives that were with me already had the antibodies so they weren't concerned about it.  Definitely different than the US.  I'm just really thankful I didn't have to labor with a mask on!

Our midwives were Anna and Anja and they were both excellent. I was their only patient so they were there pretty often unless we were resting.  Anna saw in my birth journal from Stella's birth that she helped me during postpartum with Stella 2.5 years ago.  Throughout the contractions, Jake pushed in on my knees to help relieve the pain. The midwife did this and he took over once he got there.  It was definitely helpful.

This smile is brought to you by my walking epidural! I don't know why these aren't offered in the US. I am VERY thankful I had one for all 3 of my labors.

At 2040, I got the epidural which was fantastic! In Sweden, it is a walking epidural so it only numbs my contractions. I can still walk, feel my legs, use the bathroom, etc. It was put in while I was sitting up (same as it was for Stella).  It took a few minutes to take effect and then things were much better! We also realized the midwife who delivered Stella was working right then too and she stopped by to say hi which was so nice!

Yogurt, saft (flavored water), bread with cheese, butter and pepper.

There was a midwife change and now we had Karin and Lillian who started around 2140. I got some food (they allow you to eat during labor as long as things are looking good but will withhold food if labor might be heading towards a c-section which is what happened with Linnea's labor) and Jake napped.  I slept from 22-23.  At 23 I was checked and I was 5 cm dilated.  They decided to break my water since my contractions had slowed down a bit. I also got another epidural dose because I could start feeling them again.

Getting some rest

An hour later, at midnight, I was fully dilated so I made quick progress. Five centimeters in one hour and so thankful I didn't have to feel all of those contractions.  After I was fully dilated I waited for the pushing sensation. I switched between being on all fours and on my left side and right side.

Around 230 the midwives came in and said they wanted me to try pushing after I went pee.  Well, my epidural had traveled down far enough that I couldn't figure out how to pee. So they used a catheter to drain my bladder to give me as much room as possible for the baby to come out. I started pushing at 240 laying on my left side. I had been practicing using my ab muscles throughout my pregnancy to hopefully help the pushing stage go faster than it did with Linnea and Stella (they were over an hour of pushing each).  I had heard that 'purple pushing' where you hold your breath isn't great for your pelvic floor even though it is very effective.  I was encouraged to hold my breath while I pushed which I wasn't thrilled about.  Thankfully Jake encouraged me to speak up about it and I tried it my way a few times but she said I had more strength while holding my breath. I also wanted something to pull on while I pushed because that was supposed to help keep my pelvic floor relaxed.  And guess what, there was a handle that popped up on the side of the bed right where I needed one.  

My epidural had traveled down far enough that I couldn't feel any of the pushing. No ring of fire this time.  This was both good and bad.  I didn't like feeling it with Stella but at least I could somewhat control my pushing.  This time I was pushing blind.  After about 20 minutes the internal heart rate monitor stopped working so they sent another midwife in to put a monitor on my belly which made pushing a little more awkward.  I felt Echo's head so I knew it was getting close.  Then the next thing I know Echo is out in one push. I'm always in disbelief when they say one more push especially this time since I had literally just started pushing. I also realized Echo came out and I didn't have an episiotomy. With Linnea and Stella their heads came out first and then the next push was their body. This time Echo came out all at once. As they brought Echo to my chest Jake said 'He is here.' and I said he?  Yep! Echo was a boy and he arrived at 3:03 am.

I delivered the placenta 20 minutes later or so which I didn't feel other than them pushing on my belly.  We did get to look at the placenta which is really cool!  I couldn't believe we had a boy.  He was on my chest and crying and I tried to just soak in those newborn moments.  Jake cut the cord and I did skin to skin with Echo for 2 hours.  That is the norm in Sweden. As soon as the baby is born you do skin to skin for 2 hours before they take the baby to weigh and measure him.  I did have to get just a couple of stitches but I did not have an episiotomy like I did with both girls which resulted in lots of stitches so I was really happy to hear that.  It made me think all the pelvic floor relaxing moves I did really paid off. TMI ahead so skip to the next paragraph if you want.  I asked Jake later on about what the midwife was doing when I was pushing. He said she was using lube and stretching me after each push to help get the head out. I had no idea but it definitely helped.

As per birth day tradition, I threw up about an hour after he was born. I did the same thing with Linnea.  With Stella, I threw up the morning I was in labor because I took pain meds on an empty stomach.  Throwing up right after giving birth is not fun but it was short-lived and then we moved on. We got after birth fika delivered and called our parents to tell them that Echo had arrived. I messaged several friends in the states who were still up. It was fun laboring in the middle of the night but still having a support team awake and cheering me on.  They moved us to our room around 5 am and we tried to get some sleep.

The two midwives who delivered Echo.  The one on the left was the head midwife.

After delivery fika!

4:21 am and happy!

The hospital does not give you much for your aftercare. You need to bring blankets and swaddles for the baby.  They do provide diapers and there was a small package of wipes.  In Sweden, they often use square napkin like things that you wet with water versus regular wipes.  For me, I was given mesh underwear (sexy), huge pads, slightly smaller pads and that is it. If you want a peri bottle you need to bring your own (and I did - one similar to the new Frida Mama one which has an angled spout).

As soon as we walked into the room Jake fell on the bed and didn't move for over an hour and then actually got in the bed and went to sleep. Apparently, he was tired.  I held Echo and fed him and slept while holding him for a bit.  He had his vitals checked at 9. They checked his oxygen level in his hand and foot. Apparently, if there is a difference in the readings then they know to look for cardiac issues.  They also counted his breathing because there was some poop in the water which could cause issues for him plus I had group b strep which could also cause issues with him.

We called the girls in the morning so they could meet Echo. It was really sweet.  

Then we spent the day snuggling, feeding, taking a nice long shower and sleeping. We ate breakfast which Jake got from the parent room and then later he picked lunch and dinner from a menu including dessert. I think it is interesting that they tested me for COVID but the dads are the ones walking the hallways getting breakfast, lunch and dinner. My food was included but Jake had to pay about $9 per meal. It was so quiet and nice spending the day at the hospital.  

Postpartum for pictures (above) vs reality (below)

When you meet your baby it is so funny because you grew them for 9 months but you don't really recognize them yet.  But now, seeing his birth pictures 9 weeks later I know him and recognize his little face!

That night we swaddled Echo to get some sleep.  He did pretty well but I also held him a little. My bed was a hospital bed which was adjustable but Jake's wasn't so he had a harder time holding him while in bed. The next morning they told us we could go home that morning.  They needed the room and we actually stayed longer than some second/third time moms usually do especially during COVID but that was mostly because of the group b strep and the poop in the water.  He got checked by the pediatrician and we headed home right around lunch. 

His first check with the pediatrician. (I just quickly looked over Stella's birth story and this was the same pediatrician who looked her over.  The one who looked at Linnea looked like Vin Diesel but he was at a different hospital.)

We ate lunch at home and tried to get settled before Jake went to pick up the girls. He ended up staying with the girls and eating dinner with our friends.  It was nice being at home with just Echo before the chaos started!

It's so crazy that you just walk out with a baby. No one even making sure you know what you are doing. And thanks to our social insurance we signed zero papers and paid $42 total for the entire birth and prenatal care.

We had to rate the hospital experience before leaving and I gave it 10 out of 10.  It was great. I felt well cared for during delivery and postpartum. We had midwives there to help if we had questions about nursing or whatever but we also had privacy and our own room and our own bathroom. COVID complicated things a bit but not much.  I did find out I tested negative for COVID.

Two guys took this picture above. I think they thought we were tourists until they realized we just had a baby. Echo was 36 hours old in this picture. Anyway, they asked what his name was and we said, "We're thinking about Otto" and they said Oat-toe (Swedish pronunciation) and said it was a great name!

Lunch at home!

Once the girls got home they washed their hands, changed their clothes, and then sat on the sofa waiting for Echo and me to come out and greet them.  Echo screamed during most of the meeting but the girls didn't seem to mind.

Such proud big sisters.

If you'd like to read Linnea's birth story, Stella's birth story or about prenatal care and giving birth in Stockholm click on the links.