Broken record here but time is flying by. You are fun, happy and content. You have been mobile this whole month and I feel like it is a game changer. You can interact with Linnea and also get into ALL THE THINGS.
Before I get into what you've been up to this month I wanted to talk a little bit about postpartum fog. The biggest change this month was probably with me. I feel like some postpartum fog that honestly I didn't know was even there lifted. Once it lifted I could definitely recognize that I hadn't been myself, like truly myself since probably before I was pregnant with Stella. My pregnancy with Stella was hard. Significantly harder than with Linnea. I was sick, throwing up multiple times per day for over half of the pregnancy plus the exhaustion of growing a child and taking care of a toddler was hard. I barely had enough energy to get through the day so being silly and creative with Linnea just didn't really happen while I was pregnant.
After Stella was born I felt so much better. I could eat food again without fearing I would throw it up minutes later. I had more energy and I could move around so much better. I thought I was back to 'normal' but Jake would make comments occasionally about me still not being myself. He didn't say them in a rude way, just more an observation and to see if we could talk about it to fix it. I didn't know what to tell him. I thought I felt like myself. I couldn't pinpoint anything that wasn't 'normal'. I mean, I was tired and overwhelmed by taking care of two kids and feeling like this newborn and toddler stage would never end but that was normal right? The transition to two kids was harder than I thought it would be but I wasn't crying all the time or anxious. I was definitely crankier than normal but 'normal' was 18 months ago and maybe I've just always been this cranky ;).
Once the 'fog' lifted I realized I wasn't my normal self before. I had the energy to dance, sing and be silly with Linnea again. I wasn't so frustrated or overwhelmed and it didn't feel like I was just dragging myself through the day until 7:30 hit and they were both asleep. I don't know exactly what changed but Jake and I have both felt the difference. I think a big factor is that I am working out more consistently for the first time in about 2 years. It isn't even a super hard workout but it is apparently enough to make a huge difference in my energy level and attitude.
Over the last 9 months (and probably the 9 before that when I was pregnant), I was jealous of Jake and Linnea's relationship. He had so much energy and creative bandwidth and I didn't. I liked seeing how close they were but it made me feel like I would never have that closeness with Linnea again. Like he had 'won' and I needed to just face the facts and move on. I was the boring parent so why should I even try. Then I realized how incredibly depressing that was considering she is only 3.
I listened to a great podcast about 'checking in' with your kids when you are wanting to 'check out'. She talked about using all 5 senses to engage with your child. Having that as a guide to reconnect with Linnea has been so good. I think there was a snowball effect with working out, my energy coming back, the fog lifting and being more intentional to check in with Linnea. It has made a huge difference.
Just hoping that if I share this someone might be able to relate.
Back to regular programming. Here is what you have been up to this month sweet girl:
Stats
I have no idea how much you weigh or how long you are. I could weigh you but since I'm typing this sentence 1 day before you turn 10 months old it wouldn't be that accurate ;). I'd guess you weighed about 7.65 kg (16 lbs and 13 oz).
This little stinker was stingy with her smiles this month.
Seriously mom. Enough is enough.
EatingYou have been eating more table food this month. Linnea was 11 months old before she got her first tooth and I naively thought she couldn't really eat table food until she had teeth. After she got her first tooth I realized babies chew with their gums in the back of their mouth so having teeth isn't essential for eating table foods. You LOVE feeing yourself. It keeps you entertained and you get fed so win-win! It does make a HUGE mess on the floor but that's the trade off I guess.
You love sweet potatoes, peas and pears. I used Jake's sous vide machine to make chicken this month and you loved it. It was super tender and easy to eat. You are also a fan of slow cooker carnitas.
You usually have yogurt and fruit puree for breakfast. Then for lunch, you either eat something I am eating if it is soft enough or have some baby food. You don't care for baby food with chunks. Apparently, if it is going to be chunky you want to feed the chunks yourself. Pureed food is fine on a spoon though.
When we nurse first thing in the morning I'm usually just wearing a t-shirt and not a nursing tank top so you can see my belly. You love playing with my belly button. You will actually lift my shirt up to find it.
While you are nursing you also like to rub your hand all over your head. You do this mostly at night during the last nursing session.
Now that you are really good at crawling you will crawl to me when I tell you it is time for some milk. It is so cute!
Sleeping
You are doing fairly well in the sleeping department. There were a few nights in a row where you would wake up between 8:30-midnight and have a panicky cry. I would go in to hold you but if I tried to hand you off to your daddy you weren't having it. You would lose your ever-loving mind! Then when I would take you back you'd almost chuckle. Turd.
I do not know how this is comfortable.
Waking up is hard sometimes
ClothesYou are wearing size 4 libero diapers this month. Your clothes are mostly 9 month with a few 6 month tops and 12-month sleepers.
I had a great time dressing you in Halloween clothes even if your dad wasn't a fan.
Playtime
Playtime this month is 'let's get into all the things'. You've found cords, your sister's toys and you LOVE the broom and dustpan! Since you are the second kid I already know how to 'discipline' you by making a little noise to indicate that you can't play with it (instead of saying 'no no') and then I move you to somewhere else.
Our Days
I feel like our days haven't changed that much but I know it is easy to think I'll remember them forever when I won't. So maybe next month I'll do a 'Day in the Life' post so I remember what it was like staying home with you.
I love riding on the metro!
Activities and OutingsI got up the courage to host a rhyme time with friends this month. I LOVED going to rhyme time at the library when we lived in Olathe. It was fun to learn new songs and rhymes but I also just enjoyed getting out of the house and seeing other adults during the day. After going to a few rhyme times with Linnea I noticed two moms with little girls similar to Linnea's age. I got up the courage to ask if they wanted to hang out sometime and we hit it off. Even though we live an ocean away we still keep up on Instagram and I'm so thankful for their friendship!
I was hoping to do something similar with you. There are rhyme/song/story times at libraries here but I felt like all of them were right in the middle of your nap and that just wasn't going to work. So I decided to host my own!
I have a huge stack of rhymes from rhyme time in the US and a great resource which the Johnson County Public Library shared with me which is jbrary. They also have a YouTube channel with all their songs and rhymes. I went to both places and started planning the first rhyme time. We've had 2 of them so far and they've been so fun! I've typed up song sheets and handed them out at both get-togethers. I realize that might be over the top but I love it!
Both of you got sick this month. Ugh. It was NOT fun. Linnea came home from school on a Monday with green discharge coming out of one eye. It was going around the school so we had to keep her home from school. Of course, I did my best trying to keep you two apart but that is so hard now that you can crawl. By Thursday or Friday of that week, you started having green discharge. It took 2+ weeks for Linnea to get over it. It was viral so we had to let it run its course and keep her home until it cleared up which was 8 school days. I got sick with a head cold shortly after Linnea got sick. It was HARD taking care of two sick girls when I was also sick.
Sharing her paci and boycotting her nap.
A little smirk even with swollen, goopy eyes.
I love fall. I love all of the leaves and the colors. I took a few pictures of the girls in the leaves and we also had family pictures taken.
I love her fist full of leaves and her little tongue sticking out.
Pictures by my coworker Barbara Kucera.
Her tongue facial expressions!
We celebrated Halloween this month. Trick or treating isn't that popular yet but it seems to be getting more common. Linnea did get to dress up for school.Pictures by my coworker Barbara Kucera.
Her tongue facial expressions!
She wanted to be Lava Man from Moana but her school said no scary masks. When Jake dropped her off he noticed several kids had masks and face paint so they laminated her mask but she didn't wear it much. It was too large and too tight to her face.
They had a great day celebrating Halloween!
We did go downstairs to trick or treat at one neighbor's apartment and then they came up to us as well which was fun.
Firsts and New Skills
Your dad claims that you pulled up to your feet but I was not there to see it so it doesn't count ;). You so badly want to walk/stand but the way you try isn't very efficient. You basically straighten your legs and stand on your feet but with your hands on the floor (like a downward dog) or a bear crawl. Ha!
You started clapping this month just after you turned 8 months old actually. You don't do it very often but you like to bang two toys together which is pretty much just like clapping.
Sister Moments
Linnea is having to learn how to share toys with you now that you can actually get in the middle of whatever she is doing. I don't like when older siblings take a toy from a younger kid and give them something else. I want her to learn that even though you are little and may not care we don't take toys from someone who is actively playing with it. For the most part, she is still very sweet to you. If you start fussing she will either bring you a toy or start clapping and making faces at you. She even shares her beloved Alix with you.
When your sister tries to make sure you have something to play with . . .
Linnea earned a baby doll for Stella. It was so cute!
Sisters are so much fun!
Monkey
Swinging
Don't mind me, mom, just pushing Stella into this box . . .
Linnea's school has been working on numbers for the past 7 weeks. Linnea can count in English and in Swedish but sometimes she gets confused if you ask what is 6 in Swedish. I can tell they are studying bigger numbers as well because she'll throw out numbers like 45 (which was her go-to favorite number for a while). She is starting to be able to read bus numbers and bus stop signs which is fun.
Finding numbers on the way home from the store.
Speaking Swedish to Emma.
Loopy Moana singing
Going on a walk with Alix
Slide or Stroller ramp?
Linnea has been learning about numbers at school so we've been hearing lots of:
"I want 6 cookies." "Let's count to 7." "Can I have 6 cookies? How about 5? I want 11 cookies." "I want you to set a timer for 6 minutes." I want you to lay down with me for 7 minutes."
Since Stella was on the move so much this month Linnea was constantly asking "Can Stella have ____?" to know whether or not we should take it away. She knows plastic bags are a big no-no for Stella.
We don't let Linnea sit on our laps when we eat but after we are done eating she can sit on our laps at the table. One night she said, "Daddy, are you done eating? My hands are clean." Aka, can I sit on you?
Remember
I want to remember what it felt like when the fog finally lifted. Like I could see again or breathe deeply.
Jake's caption for these picture through Stella's eyes: "This is my mama!"
Love you Sweet Girl!
Your Mama
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